everyone wants a piece of the action
Family Photos
Approximate time:
15 - 45 minutes
I hate to say it, but no matter how prepared a photographer is, they'll still need your help the most during the family photos. You’ll have a specific amount of time set aside for family and formal photos (we'll talk about the formals in the next instalment), and family photos can easily eat up a lot of that time if you're not careful. Here are some tips to make this time run more smoothly.
The ceremony ends, and you have dozens of family members, many who may not have seen you in years, milling about, chatting, socializing, and vying for your attention. Often there will be a receiving line (and sometimes whether you like it or not), with lots of hugging, handshaking, and congratulating going on. The problem is, you've probably planned on a time for people to hang out and socialize, and you've paid for a space in which to do this: it’s the reception!
To prepare for family photos, you'll want to consider three things:
1) a plan
Before the wedding day, think about who you're going to want in the family photos, and even get an idea of which combinations of people will be in various photos. You don't need to worry too much about the location of the photos, since the photographer should be able to find the best spot, but they won't know your whole family. So it's up to you to sort out the contents. As a side note, this photo spot will be both separated from the rest of the wedding guests so that it's less crowded and more easily managed, while still being close enough to where the ceremony just took place to easily snag everyone needed.
Your plan doesn't need to be super-detailed, but as long as you have a good idea of how things should play out, and which family members you'll need to combine groups (and which groups need to be kept separate for...reasons), you'll save yourself a lot of confusion.
It’s also a great idea to have one person who won’t be in a lot of the photos, but knows just about everyone at the wedding, to oversee the execution of the list on the wedding day. Most people have that one friend or relative who both knows everyone, and loves telling them where to stand. I’d hate to provide them of this moment.
Having all this ready in advance also makes the next part much easier:
2) Advance notice
As much as you might be enjoying the receiving line time, it's good to keep in mind that many of these family members currently congratulating and well-wishing you will soon be needed for family photos. While you're greeting and talking in your receiving line, feel free to let people know when and where they will be needed for photos. This will potentially save you from having to send the best man running to find your wandering Aunt Flo before the picture taking can begin.
Even better than this is when people already know ahead of time where they're expected to be. This can be accomplished by putting a note in the program, or by appointing someone other than yourself to go around immediately before or after the ceremony to let everyone know. But just keep in mind, there will almost always be at least one person who doesn't get the memo!
It’s happened a few times in the past that a somewhat pivotal family member (mother, father, uncle, etc) immediately went back to their hotel room as soon as the ceremony ended to wait for the reception, and totally missed out on the family photos. Make sure they’re aware that they’ll be needed!
3) Start Big
Begin with the biggest family photos, the largest groups, and work your way down from there. This way you can let the people who won't be in a lot of the pictures quickly go about their business, leaving you with a smaller group of people to manage. Also focus earlier on the family members that you don't want standing around for too long, i.e. grandparents and children. The quicker you get them back to what they were doing, the happier they will be. Your siblings, friends and parents can wait and stand around a little longer. They'll be okay.
Family photos can take anywhere between ten minutes and an hour, depending on how smoothly everything goes. Once you've squeezed everyone in, you can get into the limo/jeep/unicycle-brigade and head off to your formal photos site (and the next instalment of this series).
4) give the kids a break
As much as you might really want to include the kids in this beautiful day, most kids just aren’t cut out for a full wedding day. There’s a lot going on, and the attention is rarely on them as they’re accustomed to. It’s usually best to have a side room or other location for them to play, decompress, and rest when they’re not really needed for some kid-task or a photoshoot.
If they’ve already been dragged along for every little thing that’s happening, by the time you get to having pictures taken with them it’s pretty common for the kids to be totally over it and put up a huge fight.
And for really little kids, please don’t skip the nap “just this one time”. You know as well as I do the odds of that turning out well are … not great. If at all possible let them keep their usual schedule, enlist the help of family to keep them entertained and rested and fed.
Oh, and speaking of fed, don’t forget the food bribes 🤣
